Sunday, 15 April 2007


While child sexual abuse takes several forms, here is one that is particular brutal and gut-wrenching

A few excertps from the narration:

"....These are the situations that had connections. And another. I was at work installing security alarms. The client's home was a concrete yard with two large dogs. The yard was hardly cleaned and it smelled of dog droppings badly. I hated this smell. It made me feel sick, very sick inside. And I hated dogs. Then three weeks latter my journal records remembering having them set their dog on me licking my genitals, me feeling sick about this and them having the dog do his business on my face. It's no wonder I feel that connections are important. I believe the things we hate are strongly connected to those earlier traumatic experiences. It's as though our feelings are the roadmap to our earlier childhood experiences. It's no wonder the things I hate are so strongly connected to the terror I experienced as a child."

"...I can't talk about my childhood experiences without mentioning its effect on my understanding or more significantly my experience of God. To me God had turned his back on me, I was a dirty rotten no good for nothing low life, who deserved to be hurt, who was headed for hell. My self-image and my view of my creator was badly twisted and engrained in my life. Undoing this and then rebuilding it was horribly painful and difficult."

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